then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I think I sprained my soul last night
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
