3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
i need to put some appletini on your dick
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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