I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize