I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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