My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize