omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
