In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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