8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My vagina just clenched in fear
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize