Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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