how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
