Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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