physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
my poor anus
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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