My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
