yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
