Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
We had to coat check the pizza.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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