I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Randomize
