12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
