Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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