this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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