with your own penis?
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
