fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
