Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Sponge bath it is.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
