I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
