Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
So much Jack, so little girl.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
