I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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