My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The struggles of a small town man whore
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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