There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
