his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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