i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
