Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
