i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
there was a trapeze. enough said
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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