i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
