I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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