their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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