You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
