the new term for farting is butt boxing.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Randomize
