my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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