We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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