So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
