So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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