It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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