at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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