No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize