So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
