I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
