you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
