Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
