My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize