thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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