is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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